un-writing.

Dearest shadow,


I've been suffering from what we call a writer's block.

Everytime I sit down to write and just blab about stuff to get it off my chest,I run into a wall. I feel this profound tiredness that sleep does not seem to cure. And where is sleep when you need some? Must it come in installments to satisfy my basic needs...? I need more from where that came from.


Sometimes being unable to write, being unable to string words together makes for a very frustrating day. The funniest thing is that, I depend on stringing phrases together to create materials I need on a day-to-day basis. Heck, on a hourly basis!! I need to be coherent, not lose my words mid-sentence and make sure that I can pick up and fill in the gaps whenever something goes wrong.


I've been feeling unduly stressed over having to write recently. Yes. I know i'm being dramatic. But please, just let me.


My company has a really interesting culture. I'm using interesting as an euphemism for weird btw. As an employee, I have to do so much of written communication; mostly in very formal emails, snail mails, internal mails, etc. Even when there is very little need to have all this formality, it must simply be invented.

why. I ask.

It does not add value. It does not make sense. It adds undue stress to the reader as well as the person who is writing because neither of them get what the text is REALLY saying. It needs to be in black and white; formal tone at that and has so many multisyllable words that it sounds pretentious.

so why.

the answer is:- somethings are simply incomprehensible because the world is a strange place.


I shall try my hardest to understand all these systems. Not just the corporate ones. But systems where there are so many unwritten rules. Rules that are so illogical that it makes me cringe. At some point, where rules fail to serve and serve to fail their very existence, I shall aim to make peace with the unnecessary-ness and pray that god delivers poetic justice the way a good modernist novel should end.