all nighter.

Dearest shadow,

i'm on another marathon. to finish up things that i'm not interested in doing. the last marathon was last friday. I have friday blues i think.

so yes. its another mad rush. to be back on a track i dont give a damn about. If i was a beauty pageant queen right now, and they asked me what i'll change about the world, i'll prolly say that i want to rid the world of people who micromanage other people.


BUT. its not all bad. God's been listening to me. Really. I'm not being sarcastic here. I've been putting stuff off and everytime i feel seriously tired and cannot do this crap, i suddenly get some kinda leeway. Its almost like he's saying, yeah yeah I got you into this...i'll get you out...but not for long missie.


So thank you. For all the non-listening that's been happening in my life, i'm grateful that someone up there hears my every thought, listens to my every gripe and empathizes. and just so happens that he can do something about it and give a hand, the occasional shove and show me the pain cream when i really need some. Sometimes it gets lonely when you've to justify every damn action. every single choice. I sound like my 17 year old self right now. Sometimes i think i regress.


I need some pasta. I need to get back to killing my braincells. And i need an invisible hand to carry me through.