the hunt

dearest shadow,


There is something comforting about a cup of milo at 150 am. maybe its the chocolate. maybe its the warmth. maybe its the teensy bits of milo powder that didnt dissolve. it soothes my tummy's constant nag for sustenance...and the tin says milo is for champions. maybe its the tagline.

i've been out and about quite a lot this week. its a mixture of yay-i've-things-to-do and ah-well and at-least-i'm-doing-something. but mostly, its difficult. its back breaking work. quite literally.


i met with a career consultant. went alright. i've been trying. i've never tried harder to get a job in my entire life. i always got it. i always did. i filled shoes of permanent staff. i did their jobs and all the other crap work. i've experience dammit. hire me.

suddenly people are interested in what i'm going to do with myself. with my life. with my future. because i have an unconventional degree. i have different ideals. expect different things from a job. i wish those people will shut up. stop calling oh so conveniently to ask about me. in an ideal world, tactless people should have their mouths sewn.

shut up. leave me alone. i've done things the way i want. and i'll do my best to continue that way.


suzy and i were talking...for how long i dont know. and how it got serious, i dont know. but its true. we've grown up in many different ways. and we've learnt alot from each other. she looked through my wallet, saw movie ticket stubs and didnt say anything. helped me pack my bag, abit too methodically, perfectly according to heights, utilizing space optimally...that i realised how much we are really alike. somehow, her words give me strength. consolation. soothes a bruised ego and understands what i mean when i want to shoot someone with a pistol...


i'll get one of those. i know. even if i've to write another 10 cover letters. i know i'll update good news soon.


i hope my back doesnt kill me in the process. thank god for milo. and thank god for nice people. crossing their fingers for me. really. really. thank god.